The Goals of a lesson or talk and what people prefer to not hear

I think that Latter-day Saints have wonderful opportunities to gain knowledge and wisdom through our callings.  I also love that I don't have to listen to one person's perspective on life all the time!  I mean, when we go to Church we literally gather and learn from each other and from the Holy Spirit.  I believe that is one blessing we have in the Church.

When you are preparing for a lesson or a talk, I hope you stop for a moment to think about what your goals are for this talk or lesson.  Because otherwise, I would think it kind of pointless to give a talk or lesson without an end goal for your audience.
When I am preparing for a talk on Sunday, some of the things I would like the audience to gain from my talk are (1) feeling/promoting of/from the Spirit, (2) improved relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, (3) spiritually reenergized or motivation to keep pressing forward (that's one the reasons you go to church, right?), (4) opportunity to worship Christ (5) plus fulfill the promping of the Spirit to teach/preach as he has guided me. Now I believe some of these items overlap, but the point is that YOU as the speaker have goals for your talks and lessons.

I would also like to take a moment to add that some phrases, etc. detract from the talk or lesson. I generally hear these phrases in a talk, but they can heard in a lesson occasionally.

 1. "I looked up the definition of this word in the dictionary to begin with, and ___ means..."
First of all, we recognize that you went through materials to figure out what you wanted to say, so you don't need to state the fact you went through certain materials!  Second of all, think of your talk as an essay (because that's what your talk is).  Do you state, "Well, I went to the dictionary to gain the meaning of the word" in your papers?  No, you don't.  So, don't state your research in your talk or lesson.  We don't want to hear it unless it actually pertains to the talk itself.  If someone really wants to know the references you used then they will ask you later.

And perhaps the best way to approach definitions (if you want to include definitions) is to simply say: "Faith is..." or "The Oxford dictionary defines integrity as..."  But seriously, I think the majority of the people have an understanding of language used in the Church.  We don't need to define the word every single time it's used because we've heard lessons like this one before.

2. "I would like to list all of my shortcomings, things I need to repent of, etc...."

Talks/lessons aren't really the time for personal confessions.  However, if the personal story or confession pertains to the message of your talk, then go ahead and talk about them.  For instance, I once had a Y.W. teacher tell us girls a story from her troubled past, and it was a wonderful lesson because the story had a beginning, a middle, and an end or a resolution.  So unless listing your shortcomings follow the message of your talk or lesson please don't include them.

3. "I'm so nervous to be speaking in front of you"/"When the counselor cornered me for a talk..."

Do you ever hear one of the speakers at General Conference say this to the congregation?  No.  I'm sure they are nervous speaking to such a large crowd, but they don't state the fact!  I mean, the person is basically saying, "This is probably going to be an awful talk, and I'm sorry, but this is the last thing I want to do."  I feel like what people do when they say that is just give up, and I end up tuning out for a while because I don't want to listen to a train wreck.  (sorry!) I want to hear your talk! I mean, I did make it to sacrament meeting and I am sure it is wonderful and insightful, so please don't look so defeated up on the stand.  I want to be edified and lifted up.  I want to gain insight on how I can better myself.  Now, I am sure that speaking in front of others is difficult for some, and I totally get that (I know I am not the most eloquent in front of people), but I promise that the more often you practice speaking in front of others, the easier it gets.  I also recommend reciting your talk a few times before you actually give it in sacrament meeting or following these wonderful tips found here.

4. "I might cry, but please forgive me..."
I know I said talks above, but I often hear this in testimony meetings. Please...just cry.  I understand the warning is meant to be nice, but sometimes, (this is mean of me perhaps) I just want to look away or tune out because I know what is coming.  At the moment someone is saying this I feel like I am invading a personal and private moment, and I'm not sure what to do with myself.  (Maybe this is a fault of mine--that I am not connected with my inner emotions??) Just let it flow naturally like Elder Eyring does it because I'm already flustered with your warning.  I just want to hand you a tissue, and not look into your red eyes.  I also feel like by stating you are going to cry is another way of saying, "I am kind of uncomfortable crying in front of you, but I am going to do it anyways and make you equally as uncomfortable."  So please just let it flow (let it flow, let it flow).  

I hope these tips help, and that I am not too mean in attacking my fellow Church friends.  If you ever hear me do anything listed above, you have every right to laugh at me or something. I realize preparing for a talk or lesson can be difficult, but I am sure you and I have plenty to learn about.

Recipe: Pancakes

I love pancakes.  However, I married someone who doesn't like pancakes, waffles, or French toast...  Don't worry, he will eat crepes, though!  Since my husband doesn't like pancakes, I still make them for me. I will make the batter according to the recipe, and use it over a few days. Since this recipe has raw eggs, you don't want to keep it more than a week (the batter looks really yucky after a few days).

Ingredients:
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 1/2 cup oatmeal
2 cups of milk
3 eggs
2 tbsp baking powder
2 tbsp sugar or honey (I use sucanut)
a dash of cinnamon, optional
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 cup butter or coconut oil (or a combination of both) plus extra butter for cooking

You can soak the grains in soured milk (milk plus a little bit of lemon juice or apple cider vinegar) over night to help with phytic acid if you wish to or just make them the morning of.  Combine dry ingredients in a mixing bowl, and add in all "wet" ingredients.
Melt butter in frying pan. Add in 1/4 cup to 1/3 cup of batter to hot pan. Allow pancake to cook for a few minutes before flipping it. Cook on other side for a few minutes. Best eaten with lots of butter and real maple syrup. Or you could eat it them with applesauce and a few chopped almonds or even with banana slices and honey.

Do you have a favorite topping for your pancakes?

Conversion story part 1: Baptism

I've wanted to do a post on my conversion into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for a while for a couple of reasons.  The first reason is that a few of my (girl) friends have had opportunities to go on missions, and I've can't help but admire their courage and their faith.  As you'll find out later from my experience, sister missionaries are amazing, and I would not be where am I today without them.  The second reason I've wanted to do this post is for reflection on my conversion story in lightly of thr revent lether from Ms. Kelley. I'm not sure what it is, but I always end up reflecting on my membership after reading about her and her feelings about what the church should be.  Honestly, I look back at this time as a time when I learned a lot about myself and my relationship with Christ.

     I feel like a number of events/opportunities in my life have been carefully timed out, and I really believe that everything happens for a reason.  My conversion story started with the simple desire to be baptized.  I had the opportunity to witness a couple of baptisms at a couple of churches during the summer before I entered the fifth grade.  Watching those two people get baptized really made me wonder why I wasn't baptized or whether I was baptized as a baby, etc.  I also remember my step-sister and step-brother looking and sharing at a picture of themselves right after they had gotten baptized.  I really wanted to be like them partially because I looked up to them and partially because I felt it was right.  My dad and my step-mom weren't really religious, and we didn't attend church often as a family, but they had my siblings and me attend a local church youth activity on Wednesday nights.  I recognized that baptism is pretty important for the spiritual well-being just like I recognized that having Christ in my life is important as I was taught at this youth program.

    However, I didn't share this desire to be baptized with anyone at the time because I am not a very assertive person, and honestly I didn't think my dad and step-mom would understand or really care to do anything about it.  But fortunately, my mom moved closer to me later that summer and ended up staying for a while.  So, my sister and I would spend time with her on the weekends and we would end up going to church with her.  One Sunday, after a sacrament meeting in which a little girl was proclaimed as the newest member of the ward after having just been baptized, I got up the courage and I said, "Mom, I want to get baptized."  She laughed and said, "Well, you just can't get baptized; you have to talk with the missionaries."  So I said, "Okay.  Well, I want to see the missionaries then."

It was that easy.. . Actually asking for this was still hard.

So, we set up an appointment with the missionaries, and I'm sure I must have been the easiest person to teach because I was just so ready.  The missionaries that I saw were Sister "Po" and Sister "O".  Sister "O" was from Mongolia, and I can't remember her actual last name now, but she was really sweet and courageous because she was the only member of the church in her family.  Sister "Po" was from Idaho, and I really admired her as well.  Sure, I didn't know what I was getting into, but after praying about this Church and The Book of Mormon, I felt good about it.  Not only that, everything that the missionaries taught just clicked in my mind.  Learning about the Gospel was amazing because everything felt simple, yet the teachings are complete. I was really at peace.  I loved it. These sisters were wonderful, and we had amazing discussions, and I felt the love of Christ as they taught.

    I started taking discussions in late August or September, and I was baptized a couple of months later on 26 November 2000 on a cold Sunday evening.   Because I saw my mom every other weekend, I didn't go through discussions very quickly.  My baptism is special to me because I really wanted it.  I wanted to be 'saved' as some churches say, and I wanted to be a disciple of Jesus Christ. Afterwards, I didn't necessarily feel different, but I felt good. The only regret I have is that I didn't invite all of my family to my baptism because I was worried that my parents would just end up in an argument (not over my baptism, but a fight in general). My dad found out my sister and I had been baptized when we came home with wet hair. ("Are you trying to get sick?!")      

   I was confirmed a week later in sacrament meeting. Even though I learned about confirmation and the gift of the Holy Ghost from the sisters, I still didn't know exactly what was going on. So I remember looking around as I was being confirmed. I wish I could remember some of what was said.

 This is part one of my conversion story. I will continue the rest of this story in part 2.

6 weeks

Tycho looks like me here, but I think he resembles Greg.

Tummy time with daddy (this outfit hardly fits him now :( ).

father's day

Makin' cute faces at daddy

I wish I had a picture of Tycho going home from the hospital, but this is the cute outfit he wore. Now he actually fits it better.

Sleepy baby in a blanket my Nana made before she knew I was having a boy...but I love the color combination so there.

I can't believe I've been a mama for over a month now! Time flies so quickly. It truly feels like yesterday since we brought our son home. Sometimes I forget momentarily when I am alone and Greg is with Tycho in another room. "Oh yeah, I have a baby..." (If you notice typos, I apologize; typing on a tablet is hard, but it's easier to hold than a laptop when I have a sleeping baby in my lap. Also, blogger decided to put pictures in the wrong place, and I've been working on this post for too long to care about nitty gritty details like that especially while working on a blasted tablet. )
                                            About Tycho
So thus far Tycho has been eating like a champ, and weighed 11 lbs, 10 oz. when we took him into the midwive's office last week. I am quite pleased to hear that breastfeeding is going well. He is 24 inches, and his head measures 50 cm... if that means anything to you. All I know is Tycho has a nice bald line across the back of his head now.

He has a nice grip now--I now need to keep the hair pulled back so he won't grab unto it all the time. But I think it's cute when he grabs unto my shirt while eating.

Tycho has started to babble or coo when he's happy (usually after he poops/diaper change).

He enjoys tummy time and play time so much. The activity mat is a great toy. When he's hanging out on us and looking over our shoulder, he'll show off his neck muscles and push off our body with his strong arms.

Sometimes he'll start to chew on my shirt or shoulder when he wants to eat.  He's pretty cute.

Somehow Tycho manages to get lint stuck to his fingers, and stuff under his nails. Crazy kid. Although, I think he gets stuff under his nails when he grates his finger nails across the sheet at night. Creepy!

He gets hiccups a lot, and I think it's a sign from lack of good burping and waking up when he's still fatigued?? I don't know. I just know that grunting starts it.

Methinks he's starting to get cradle cap (ew).

He likes to walk (I mean hang out in our arms) around the play ground in our back yard as our nightly routine.

Tycho has also started to smile at us. Hooray! This also usually takes place around the time he poops...

Tycho loves to sleep on his side. It drives me crazy sometimes especially when I think of SIDS. He has started to sleep on his back more frequently, but he flails so much more and wakes easily, so we have had to learn to swaddle...yeah I didn't swaddle foe a while because it's so hot in our room in the summer plus I suck at swaddling/didn't know any better...I thought the sleep sack would be sufficient. But now it's kind of late for a good swaddle without flailing arms because he likes his hands free.

                                     Things I have learned:
  As a new mom, I kind of wish I had known things concerning naps and sleep, etc. I don't necessarily have a schedule for Tycho, but man, I wish I had placed some kind of regular, yet flexible routine at the beginning.  Not just for his sake, but for mine (so selfish,  I know). Now trying to find some kind of lifestyle I can manage is hard since we didn't establish something early on. Yay for fixing something late in the game!!! I already feel like a failure parent because I let Tycho fall asleep in my lap, but this way I know he will actually sleep. Now I just get so antsy to do things all the time, but since Tycho doesn't sleep well on his own for very long (less than an hour). it's hard and we're working on that.  Sigh.

Parenting has a steep learning curve and I find myself trying to keep up. So much mommy guilt already, too.
 
 Changing diapers wasn't so terrible initially. It was only until my milk came in that we had problems. I can't count how many times we had to change Tycho into dry clothes because he peed all over. All I have to say is now I've learned to make sure the penis is pointed down! And to untuck the diaper leg holes, and that certain brands are better than others. (I didn't realize that diapers were not supposed to allow poop to constantly get through the leg holes, but now I know better, and it was seriously driving me crazy...silly sleep-deprived me I just assumed this would be the life from now on.)

 Some people enjoy their early morning run; others, coffee, but Tycho likes his early morning poop. Tmi? Yes... it means that I have to really wake up. I guess his smiles are worth the 5 or 6 a.m. wake call...

I can make a guess as to what time it is at night and early mornings on clear days based in the sun's location now...

Babies are noisy sleepers! Seriously I understand why some would keep baby in their own room at night even at the beginning...

I love hearing Greg talking to Tycho especially when I'm in another room. His voice is so soothing and sweet. Greg is a good daddy. And he is so patient with Tycho even during Tycho's crying spells (I'm still learning patience and long-suffering).

I didn't realize babies aren't born with eye lashes. Weird, eh?

Breastfeeding makes you hungty. I often find myself eating or snacking when Tycho eats.

Two days old and getting ready for his first bath since the hospital didn't feel it was necessary to get blood and gunk out of his hair.

so relaxed, I think...I think he just tolerates a bath

Anyway, that's what going on with us. We love our sweet, happy baby.