Thursday, July 30, 2015

The Goals of a lesson or talk and what people prefer to not hear

I think that Latter-day Saints have wonderful opportunities to gain knowledge and wisdom through our callings.  I also love that I don't have to listen to one person's perspective on life all the time!  I mean, when we go to Church we literally gather and learn from each other and from the Holy Spirit.  I believe that is one blessing we have in the Church.

When you are preparing for a lesson or a talk, I hope you stop for a moment to think about what your goals are for this talk or lesson.  Because otherwise, I would think it kind of pointless to give a talk or lesson without an end goal for your audience.
When I am preparing for a talk on Sunday, some of the things I would like the audience to gain from my talk are (1) feeling/promoting of/from the Spirit, (2) improved relationship with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, (3) spiritually reenergized or motivation to keep pressing forward (that's one the reasons you go to church, right?), (4) opportunity to worship Christ (5) plus fulfill the promping of the Spirit to teach/preach as he has guided me. Now I believe some of these items overlap, but the point is that YOU as the speaker have goals for your talks and lessons.

I would also like to take a moment to add that some phrases, etc. detract from the talk or lesson. I generally hear these phrases in a talk, but they can heard in a lesson occasionally.

 1. "I looked up the definition of this word in the dictionary to begin with, and ___ means..."
First of all, we recognize that you went through materials to figure out what you wanted to say, so you don't need to state the fact you went through certain materials!  Second of all, think of your talk as an essay (because that's what your talk is).  Do you state, "Well, I went to the dictionary to gain the meaning of the word" in your papers?  No, you don't.  So, don't state your research in your talk or lesson.  We don't want to hear it unless it actually pertains to the talk itself.  If someone really wants to know the references you used then they will ask you later.

And perhaps the best way to approach definitions (if you want to include definitions) is to simply say: "Faith is..." or "The Oxford dictionary defines integrity as..."  But seriously, I think the majority of the people have an understanding of language used in the Church.  We don't need to define the word every single time it's used because we've heard lessons like this one before.

2. "I would like to list all of my shortcomings, things I need to repent of, etc...."

Talks/lessons aren't really the time for personal confessions.  However, if the personal story or confession pertains to the message of your talk, then go ahead and talk about them.  For instance, I once had a Y.W. teacher tell us girls a story from her troubled past, and it was a wonderful lesson because the story had a beginning, a middle, and an end or a resolution.  So unless listing your shortcomings follow the message of your talk or lesson please don't include them.

3. "I'm so nervous to be speaking in front of you"/"When the counselor cornered me for a talk..."

Do you ever hear one of the speakers at General Conference say this to the congregation?  No.  I'm sure they are nervous speaking to such a large crowd, but they don't state the fact!  I mean, the person is basically saying, "This is probably going to be an awful talk, and I'm sorry, but this is the last thing I want to do."  I feel like what people do when they say that is just give up, and I end up tuning out for a while because I don't want to listen to a train wreck.  (sorry!) I want to hear your talk! I mean, I did make it to sacrament meeting and I am sure it is wonderful and insightful, so please don't look so defeated up on the stand.  I want to be edified and lifted up.  I want to gain insight on how I can better myself.  Now, I am sure that speaking in front of others is difficult for some, and I totally get that (I know I am not the most eloquent in front of people), but I promise that the more often you practice speaking in front of others, the easier it gets.  I also recommend reciting your talk a few times before you actually give it in sacrament meeting or following these wonderful tips found here.

4. "I might cry, but please forgive me..."
I know I said talks above, but I often hear this in testimony meetings. Please...just cry.  I understand the warning is meant to be nice, but sometimes, (this is mean of me perhaps) I just want to look away or tune out because I know what is coming.  At the moment someone is saying this I feel like I am invading a personal and private moment, and I'm not sure what to do with myself.  (Maybe this is a fault of mine--that I am not connected with my inner emotions??) Just let it flow naturally like Elder Eyring does it because I'm already flustered with your warning.  I just want to hand you a tissue, and not look into your red eyes.  I also feel like by stating you are going to cry is another way of saying, "I am kind of uncomfortable crying in front of you, but I am going to do it anyways and make you equally as uncomfortable."  So please just let it flow (let it flow, let it flow).  

I hope these tips help, and that I am not too mean in attacking my fellow Church friends.  If you ever hear me do anything listed above, you have every right to laugh at me or something. I realize preparing for a talk or lesson can be difficult, but I am sure you and I have plenty to learn about.


No comments:

Post a Comment