pregnancy #2, week 20 something

  I realized I haven't documented this pregnancy at all on here.  Possibly, I have been distracted by a toddler who won't let me type for long on a computer without commandeering it for himself.  I've also found myself reading quite a bit because I want to enjoy that time while I can.

   We found out that we were pregnant on Thanksgiving (Canadian Thanksgiving), and the news was quite exciting.  Greg, however, wanted to keep things quiet until we saw our family in December.  That was SO hard for me to do!  I'm not sure why people want to keep things quiet during the first trimester.  I feel my worst during that time, and talking to someone about it makes you feel a little better.  We had our first appointment with our midwife on American Thanksgiving, which was quite cool.  So this baby is truly our Thanksgiving baby...not that we aren't thankful for Tycho.

  We found out last Wednesday that we're having a boy.  I thought for sure we were having a girl based on the horrible, horrible morning sickness I had.  (The highlights of said morning sickness are throwing up during stake conference and getting to leave early--Greg was SO happy to leave, and at 14 weeks, I got sick in a parking lot right after doing blood work). Although, I did read that drinking cold water only makes your tummy more upset.  And during the period of morning sickness I could only drink cold, cold water, however, and I think that may have been a contributing factor.  Who knows?  I am excited for another boy.  I have pretty much all the clothes and such for him, but also, I grew up with a sister, and my husband had all brothers.  I like the idea of having same-gendered siblings for kids.  (Although, if we have another, I hope for a girl.)  

   I've been feeling this baby kick up a storm lately, and it warms my heart.  I think I first felt him move right around Christmas.  That was exciting for me.  I've only started to notice the kicking on the outside of the tummy lately, and I find it difficult to determine when he'll be moving so that Tycho or Greg can feel the baby, too.  

  I remember when I was pregnant with Tycho I did not want citrus at all.  I had almost an entire box of clementines that I ended up giving away because they didn't suit me. This pregnancy, I've been down with citrus...in moderation, of course.  I've craved is peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with a glass of milk lately as well as cereal and biscuits and gravy.  My guess is I need the calcium.  I'm just not big on drinking milk by itself.

 The one thing I've been trying to work on is working out.  This is so hard to do right around this time of year in Canada!  I was quite happy with the fact that I didn't gain weight during the first trimester, but this trimester got me, and I feel the need to move my body.  I feel so big already!  Where did this belly come from?!  

  The only downside to this pregnancy is finding out the day following the ultrasound is that we need to go see a specialist because the ultrasound suggested that there's a possible problem with baby's heart.  Yay for advanced medicine, but boo to uncertainty and waiting.  This appointment was a possibility last week, and then they did schedule it for more than a month from now.  Who does that to a pregnant woman?!  The anxiety for this appointment was high initially, but it's gradually decreased. (Doesn't mean that I don't have strong words them for keeping me waiting.)  They scheduled the appointment so far away because (1) not life-threatening--which is good, but still frustrating to have to wait, and (2) to possibly see the heart a bit better when they have a look at the baby in a month.  My one consolation is that Tycho will be teething quite a bit for the next little while. One cuspid on one side won't stand alone for long, right?  So you know, I get to deal with his pain, and not think about this appointment.  

  So anyway, that's what's going on thus far in this pregnancy.  I'll update on what's happening to baby next month.

The struggle of getting to know your neighbors

I struggle to fit in, and I'm starting to strongly dislike where I live.

On one hand, for the longest time I struggled to get to know my neighbors with some difficulty because I wasn't a student, I was married (I know that shouldn't make a difference, but in some cases it feels like it does), and I am not from the Middle East (a number of my neighbors still keep to their cultural customs which is nice, but if you aren't from the culture, I feel like I am unsure if I fit in).  And then I had Tycho, who opened up a whole new world for me.  I thought things would *magically* change for me in my community, but I still struggle to get to know my community.

    On one hand, I can finally meet other neighbors with kids without feeling awkward by stalking them outside on the playground.  "Hey...not to be creepy, but I saw you outside, and I just wanted to meet you." I totally did that the first summer I was here.  On the other hand, I haven't felt close enough to people to actually invite people over... "Hey so I know we just met randomly outside the other day, do you want to come over?"

   Yeah, there are community events I could attend, but let's be honest, I have not kept in contact with one single person that also attended those events.  Possibly because they are no longer living here, or possibly because they didn't show up to other events...just like me.  (I have a kid now, and the food is gross.)
 
    And then there is the other time I crashed my neighbors' Eid party a few weeks ago because I was so sick and tired of feeling like the outsider.  "Hey guys, you see me all the time out here on the playground by myself... why don't you ever invite me to join you?  Can we be friends even though we are from different backgrounds?"  Turns out the awkward situations on the playground were due to the lack of ability to speak English/Arabic.  I'm still working on the Arabic.

I still get to meet people because I watch a few of my neighbors' kids, but it is still hard.  I guess I am at that point where I care because I have few other things going on in my life like school.

I am hosting a party which even though the party hasn't even happened, the plans have gone badly.  First of all, I should have planned this a couple of weeks out, but because I wanted to get this happening sooner and before snow falls, I decided to do it like a week out. And then, the forecast predicted rain, so thought, "how about the community centre?"  That was a no go.  And there is another community event which is happening around the same time I wanted to host a party, so I thought, "hey maybe we can combine forces."  But alas, I was denied.  So many hurdles.  So I am hosting a pre-cocktail party party before the community event... sans alcohol of course.

I know I am complaining a lot here, but I just feel like giving up.

Okay, I'll admit it.  I'm lonely. I want to get to know my community, but it's been so hard.    

New food rules

I just finished reading the book, "French Kids Eat Everything", and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I was inspired by the idea of eating good food for pleasure and making eating a social event.

I've decided to change some things around my house and adapt some of the rules from this book.

1. No grazing. Make a habit of eating real food At The Table! I have found that I have been eating more junk foods and not paying attention to when I'm actually hungry. I'm thrilled to toss out the baby snack foods I bought for Tycho-- and find myself eating, too. No more cheerios. No goldfish crackers. Nada. I'm excited to not carry food with me "just jn case" when I go out for errands. Yes, Tycho will have a snack (and I probably will, too), but it'll be real food and eaten because I'm hungry. It'll also save on the food budget. Double win.

2. Eat food slowly. I've always been a fast eater. I don't know why, but it's like a food eating contest or something. I want to intentionally slow down and enjoy the food and conversation. I've been trying this lately, and I have noticed I'm fuller a lot sooner.  Awesome for weight loss!

3. Eat a wider variety of food. I've noticed for a LONG time I've been buying the same foods over and over. So boring. I'm excited to switch things up a little maybe once every couple of weeks. I'm okay making similar meals because I know the recipes, and that helps make cooking faster especially since I am working that'll be easier. Anyway, I'm excited to incorporate leeks, radishes, beets, but not okra, but I'm trying it anyway!

4. Teach Tycho to eat food, not play with it. I'm so tired of his messy his chair! As well as the messy floor around the table! Ugh.
   

Here's to new and better eating habits!  

I'm at my limit...with boundaries for this kid

Lately, I have found myself struggling with keeping my certain boundaries intact with Tycho. I find myself saying, "No, no, no!" in various forms all day, and some days I find myself tired and become casual or relaxed with some of these boundaries. Get stuff out of the cupboard? Sure... go ahead. Let me help you find something. Play with the toilet...well, if he isn't putting his hands inside of the toilet... just kidding.
 
So I ask myself two questions when it comes to Tycho playing with stuff. Is it dangerous/nasty? And on a scale of 1 to 10, how much does it bother me? If it's a 6 or higher, I tend to stop him.

For instance: toilet. Nasty. Bothersome --8. Remove troublesome child away from toilet before he attempts to flush it while I'm using it.

Dial that changes temperature on hot water heater. Taped in place. Dangerous. 10. (Why is it located in a place that kids can touch it easily??)

Pulling my books off of shelf. Not dangerous but a 9 on bothersome scale.

Pulling dishes out of cupboard. Annoyance level depends on how many dishes I have had to wash lately.

Okay maybe I go to far to ask silly questions, but do other moms get tired of saying no? What do you do? Redirect. Explain annoyance or danger?

Greg is much more rigid than I am. No touching the trash can, for instance, whereas I stop him once he sticks his hands in the trash can. I don't want to be off limits, per say, but I do want him to understand that garbage goes in the trash, not his hands. Because I believe he imitates what I am doing...sometimes. (hey he threw his own diaper away the other day...and then pulled it back out of the trash along with other trash...Progress, guys!)

Anyway, what works for you guys and how long does this get- into-everything-including-toilet-phase last for? Also, I know I shouldn't laugh or smile at Tycho as he walks away from his attempts at causing trouble, grinning--'cause he knows he's been caught--but he's so darn cute.


I'm in trouble.

I miss you still

My grandfather died a year ago today. Shortly after I learned I was pregnant, I learned my grandfather had stomach cancer. The timing was not the greatest, your might say. Each time I called, I would share news of my pregnancy while I would hear news of my grandfather's illness.  But life became more meaningful with death ever present. Tycho arrived five days after my grandfather died. It was a joyous time as well a mournful time. I couldn't share Tycho with him, but I know we all rejoiced with new, beautiful life.

I know he was still hanging on--waiting for his unborn great-grandson to be born. He inquired when I spoke to him. A part of me wishes he could have met him here on earth while a part feels like he must have had the chance to meet Tycho in Heaven before Tycho was born.

I miss his strong hands and his twinkling blue eyes. I miss his cheerful manner in which he would answer the phone when I called. Even though he was a quiet man, he could always make me laugh with one of his mischievous grins. He always asked me to talk to him with "what do you know today, Sue-Sue?" I will always remember his candy stash of black licorice or good 'n  plenty in the desk downstairs and his endless number of decks of playing cards he had on the counter in the kitchen. I'll remember his quiet presence in the kitchen with his two little dogs nearby ready to go with their master. I'll remember him taking care of his cows, and helping him feed the calves. I am so grateful I got to spend so much time with him as a child. He was so good to his family and was always there when we needed him--patiently waiting to be there for us.

I love you much, grandpa.



         

Tycho at 1 year old

I haven't been good about updating y'all on Tycho, but that's because I have been writing it down elsewhere. Also, I don't enjoy typing on a tablet and my laptop is failing miserably, so those are my poor excuses.

So Tycho at a year has been fun and challenging in new ways. He started walking about 11.5 months, and since then he's getting into everything. The water heater is right inside of our laundry room and every time I go into the laundry room, Tycho wants to follow me so he can touch the water heater or the other countless things. The other day, I realize he had changed the temperature of the water because the water was incredibly hot later on (yum warm drinking water).

Oh and now that Tycho can crawl or walk around, he follows me. Cute, eh?

He's always on the move, and when he isn't, I try to change his diaper, thinking, "oh perfect, he's still", but noooo. Sometimes he'll purposely sit down after his diaper has been removed so I can't put a new one on. Changing poopy diapers has become my least favorite task because Tycho will roll over and sit up or start grabbing his poop-covered penis, and I recently started enlisting Greg's help when I can.

He's also a sweet baby boy and will cuddle with mom and dad still. I love it.

He's interested in people and other children his size, and he'll try to play with them (I mean, get into their personal space), but he doesn't care to be held by other adults.

He loves food still. Although, he doesn't like his vegetables all the time.  He likes to put non-food items in his mouth all the time. Wood bark, dirt, stuff-I've-swept-up-into-a-pile-but-haven't-thrown-out-yet, cardboard, etc.

He has said 'mama' once in my presence when he was nine months old, and I guess he has said 'ma ma ma' to Greg when I had to work. He has been able to say 'dada', 'gaga,' 'baba', and 'Greg' which sometimes sounds like 'egg'. Right now, he's on a 'gaga' kick.   My favorite is when you ask him a qiestion, and he shales his head yes or no. Usually he shakes his head no. He can sign for "all done", and I have to say that took forever. I'm still working on getting him to sign, but it's hard being consistent and getting him to watch.      

Tycho has eight teeth. The last two teeth have come in one at a time. (Huzzah! The six previous teeth came two at a time= little sleep for me. ) I've been giving Tycho the core of an apple or pear (I get rid of seeds first) which he's likes to chew on because it's cold and sweet. He also chews and chews on his books.

He loves balls. We play pass the football/basketball all the time, and he'll play with the soccerballs the kids leave on the playground.

He also likes trying to open and close things like doors/cupboard doors or a yogurt container I gave to him to play with.

He's been interested in climbing onto stuff now that he's had lots of experience climbing steps on the playground.

So Tycho sleeps for four-hour chunks at night which is so much better than the two-hour chunks from before! Yeah I know I didn't do sleep training, and I'm missing out, but I guess that was my fault for looking into having a natural birth (which I didn't get) instead of childrearing tips.

He's still nursing which I like but don't like sometimes... I haven't decided when I'm going to stop nursing him, but we'll get there when we get there.

Pictures or it didn't happen:

                        Tycho helping daddy play video games.

          He looks a lot like his daddy here. He decided to shut me out of the bathroom. Little stinker was fighting sleep.

 He was watching the kids play while I was making dinner. Poor Tycho had to stay inside. 

I have the bouncer chair set up for another baby I watch, and Tycho has been really interested in playing with it. Greg thinks it's cute he wants to be a little baby again.

Sleepy Tycho. I love the way he sleeps. He likes to kick the blanket(s) off his legs and keep it around his middle. Silly kid.  

 

Grammar help: me or I?

I'm not proficient at being grammatically correct, but I do have one grammar tip that I learned in one of my FAVORITE classes at BYU (mcomm 320) that I'd like to share with you.

How do you know when to use 'me' or 'I' when you are including yourself in an activity such as in the sentence, 'Greg and I went to the store'?

The best way that has helped me is by just talking about myself instead of what I did with my companion. For instance, is the sentence grammatically correct when I say 'Me went to the store' or when I say 'I went to the store'?

(The difference between sounding like a caveman and sounding sophisticated and well-spoken is a thin line.)


I know I oversimplified, but I hope this helps.